Operation DOLL and Operation HILL
by Darkton93
Summary: In DOLL, Numbuh 3 gets a strange doll and starts acting off. In HILL, Numbuhs 2 and 5 must find a medallion in a haunted house. Both Stories: Scary. No Arc.
1. Operation DOLL

**Pre-Reading Notes: May be slightly scary**

**Hypothetical Voice Cast**

**Andrea Libman as the Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey**

**Chris Sabat as the teenager at the end**

* * *

Now Loading: Kids Next Door Mission  
Operation: DOLL

Doll  
Ominously  
Looks  
Lively

Writing Operatives: Lieutenant Darkton  
Original Mission Director: Mr. Warburton

Adults referred to the place as Toys Be We. Children knew it better as heaven. Boy toys, girl toys, old toys, new toys, even toys you can build yourself! Not to mention clearance isles which parents could bug their children to utilize instead, almost always unsuccessfully.

Naturally, Numbuh 3 and Numbuh 4 were there, looking for something to buy, each one having ideas very different from one another. Numbuh 1 was there as well, but then he was mostly along for the ride. Numbuh 3 scanned the girl dolls section. "Pink dress dolly! Ooh! Blue dress dolly! Ah! Yellow dress dolly! *gasp* Green dress dolly!"

Numbuh 4 stormed along the halls. "Okay, you've had yer fun. Let's go check out the Mech Changers line!"

"Aww…but I was gonna check out the puppy dolls…"

"Eh, we'll check it out after we're done. Numbuh 1, you look at the stuff and see if there's anything Numbuh 3'd like."

Numbuh 1 tried to protest. "But-but I don't know anything about-"

But it was no use. "Great! Thanks! Catch ya later!"

Numbuh 1 growled. "If you ask me, this is all a big waste of time."

Numbuh 4 stared in awe of the many vehicles and animals, knowing that every single one of them turned into a powerful robot. "There's Slipguard! Ooh! Big Crusher! Ooh! Breaker! Eh?"

Numbuh 4 looked at the packaging of the toy once again. He saw writing next to Breaker's name. "Destructicon Breaker? What, did they think that we'd be too dumb to know that he was a Destructicon even though he turned into a _big freakin' tank_?! Numbuh 3, doesn't this look like a Destructicon?"

Numbuh 3 barely even looked at it. Her thoughts turned towards her crushed hopes and dreams. "I guess…"

Numbuh 4 didn't care. "Meh. Adults. Always think that we're stupid. Then again, it's not like this toy company has ever…" his eyes locked onto something. "…gotten it right?"

Staring right in front of him was a colossal box, inside it being a figure unlike any other.

"No way; _This is the Ultimate Prime Superion Figure_!" He held the box firmly in his hands and turned it around. "Light up eyes and sound! Looks just like the show! Supreme posability! Firing missiles! _This thing is just awesome_! How much am I in fer?" Numbuh 4 looked at the tag, only to find the price of victory was steep. "$_50_?! _Holy crud_! This thing's gonna eat up all of my money!"

Numbuh 3 looked at the Little Rovers isle, dejected, as Numbuh 4 continued to talk about how expensive the figure was. Just then, she heard a voice she didn't recognize. "Come one, come all! Feast your eyes on the newest delight from the world of Rainbow Monkeys!"

She turned around and found a salesman who looked rather chubby with a pair of sunglasses and an odd-looking hat pitching a very colorful Rainbow Monkey with a pinstripe suit. Numbuh 3 immediately gasped and cut through the line of potential customers. "I WANT ONE!"

"Of course you do!" the salesman continued. "This Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey isn't like the other Rainbow Monkeys you've had before! What makes this marvel of engineering so outstanding is the intensive work with microchips we've put into it, thus allowing it to put out an even greater number of frilly fun phrases!"

Numbuh 3 looked at him, confused. "What?"

"It talks! And says random things!"

"Wow! None of the dolls I had before ever talked to me!"

"Don't take my word for it! See, or hear, for yourself!" The salesman pulled the string on the monkey's foot.

"My name is Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey, and I love you very much," the strange doll said.

Numbuh 3 let out a loud gasp. "GIMME, GIMME, GIMME!"

"It can be yours, for the low, low price of $20!" the salesman said.

Numbuh 3 let out a different kind of gasp. This time, it was downtrodden. "But…but…I don't have $20! I can't buy it!"

"Oh, very sorry. I feel for your loss. Move along."

"I'm…I'm gonna get my friend! He's gonna make you give it to me! WAAAA-LLYYYYY!"

Meanwhile, Numbuh 4 was still overlooking the toy, now holding a flower with plucked petals, pulling them out one at a time. "I buy it…I buy it not…I buy it…I buy it not…" The last petal came out. "…I buy it!"

"WALLY, WALLY, WALLY, WALLY, WALLY!" Numbuh 3 screamed, grabbing hold of Numbuh 4's arm.

"Hey, what the…whoa!"

"You gotta help me, you gotta help me, you gotta help me, you gotta help me!" She pulled Numbuh 4 to the sales vendor. "Toy! Need money! You help?"

Numbuh 4 looked at the toy. "Bleh! No thanks! I don't wanna be near any of those cruddy Rainbow Monkeys!"

Numbuh 3 looked at Numbuh 4 with a saddened look.

"No way."

Numbuh 3 added to the look.

"No! Way!"

Numbuh 3 changed her look, this time giving off a stare that could pierce the hearts of even the most boyish of boys.

Numbuh 4 gulped. "Uh…how much am I payin'?"

Prime Superion grappled with his opponent, the leader of the Destructicons who transformed into a futuristic tank. "Give it up, Carnage!" Prime Superion said. "The Protectrons found that Minibot first, and you know what they say, 'finders keepers!'"

"Finish the quote, Prime Superion," Carnage said, "losers WEEPERS!" He then proceeded to hoist Prime Superion into the air and toss him on the other side of the mountain. Once he was on the other side, he fired his gigantic cannon at the ground, causing it to crumble and Prime Superion to fall. "I'm off to claim my prize! See you next fall! HAHAHAHAHA!"

A beam of light fired from a planet below while a phat beat played. The screen transitioned to Prime Superion turning into jet mode and firing missiles at an army of Destructicons, who also transformed and fought back. With another transition, the beam hit a spaceship above. "Mech Changers will return in a moment, only Toonami," spoke a cool robotic voice.

Numbuh 4 and Numbuh 1 were watching the TV together. "Numbuh 2 oughtta get here fast," Numbuh 4 said, "he's missin' out."

"I told you ten times, already;" Numbuh 1 said, "Numbuh 2 left with Numbuh 5 on a mission. They said they'd be gone for a while."

"Well that while had better get here soon. With money. I remember th' last time I tried ta steal somethin' from the toy shop. Got me in trouble with Global Command. Had that thing for all o' five milliseconds."

"Look, think of it this way, Numbuh 4," Numbuh 1 said, "you made Numbuh 3 happy by buying that toy with her. She really appreciates it."

"Yeah, well it means nothin'! I only did it so that she'd stop givin' me that look! If it were up ta me, I'd just-"

"TV time?" Numbuh 3 said, walking into the room with her Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey. "I wanna watch something!"

"Wait yer turn, Numbuh 3; we're watchin' Mech Changers."

"Mech Changers? Yech! So violin! I know a much better show than that!" Numbuh 3 grabbed the remote.

"Cover yer eyes and ears, everybody! Numbuh 3's gonna watch-"

She immediately hit the channel onto a news station with a dull reporter and text that stated Bores News 24/7. "Today on Bores News," the reporter says, "we look at any possible stock market failures and what it means for your jobs and your likeliness to work in a cubicle for eight hours straight."

"…huh?" Numbuh 4 said. "This isn't Rainbow Monkeys. In fact…it's even _worse_! Numbuh 3, why'd you change the channel to this crud?"

"Haha! Silly Wally!" Numbuh 3 said. "It always pays to keep informed. Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey told me that."

"That stupid doll can't say that! It's impossible."

Numbuh 3 pulled the string. "The More you know, the more places you go!" said the doll.

Numbuh 4 looked puzzled. "Did that doll just…it said…and Numbuh 3 was like…oh, never mind!" Numbuh 4 slumped over.

"Uh, Numbuh 3, we're trying to watch our show; why don't you go play with your dolls in your room?"

"Well…" Numbuh 3 said, "…okay!" She then skipped to her room, doll in hand.

"QUICK! CHANGE THE CHANNEL!" Numbuh 4 said. With a push of a few buttons on the remote, he was back to watching robots vs. robots.

"We must never speak of this again," Numbuh 1 said.

"Agreed." Numbuh 4 said.

Suddenly, the alarm started blaring. "Incoming message from Numbuh 362."

"I'll get Numbuh 3," Numbuh 4 said, rushing off to her room.

Numbuh 3 was in the middle of a tea party with her stuffed animals, including, of course, Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey.

"I'm so happy you all could come to this party!" Numbuh 3 said. She imitated Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey's voice. "More crumpets, please." She then spoke in her own voice "Oh, I'm sorry, I don't have that." Back to the Monkey's voice. "Well, how about some cookies?" And to her voice. "Yeah, we do! One moment please!" She grabbed the Monkey and left the room.

However, she was soon greeted by Numbuh 4. "Hey, Numbuh 3?" he said. "There's a mission goin' on. Let's go!"

"Uhh…I'm in the middle of my tea party. It's very busy."

"Oh, come on! This is a mission! You can't just walk out on it!"

"Maybe we should ask Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey what she thinks."

Numbuh 4 put his palm to his head. "Oh, great. Again with the stupid monkey."

Numbuh 3 pulled the string. "Fighting never solved anything talking couldn't solve!"

Numbuh 4 stared in shock.

"Sorry, I'm not going. Have fun! Buh-bye!" Numbuh 3 said, heading back into her room and shutting the door.

Numbuh 4 growled, then reached for the door. However, when he tried to open it, he found out that it wouldn't budge. She had locked it! "Fine! Go play with your stupid dolls! See if I care!"

A man in a yellow outfit with a lightbulb on his head laughed as he made children run. "Kids Next Door, your video gaming, TV watching, power wasting days are over! Now you face…BRIGHT IDEA!" He fired electricity at a TV monitor, causing it to overload and shut down. He proceeded to do the same thing to a video game console, causing that to fry. "Once I reach the central power core of the base, there'll be nothing you can do to stop me!"

"Well," a voice said, "we'll just have to make sure you never get there!" It was Numbuh 1, armed with a S.C.A.M.P.P., along with Numbuh 4, armed with a S.P.I.C.E.R.

"_Two_ operatives? You're kidding. You're kidding, right?"

Numbuh 4 spoke. "Uh, look. We're having a bad day. Two of our members are off on another mission, and one of us is stuck in her room; so maybe you could just, ya know, go easy on us, 'kay?"

The two were immediately shot with electricity, making their skeletons visible. "No," said Bright Idea. He then proceeded to rush off. The two operatives immediately collapsed on the floor. The power to the base also went off, shutting down the lights.

The two operatives, charred and beaten beyond all belief, returned to the base. "That was the worst mission we've ever been on," Numbuh 1 said.

"Yer tellin' me?" Numbuh 4 said. "I'm gonna go get somethin' ta eat." But when he opened up the fridge, he came across a horrifying sight. "Fruit! Vegetables! Everywhere! Who put those there?!"

Numbuh 3 walked in, Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey in stow, and said "_I diiid_!" in a singsong voice.

"What?! Why?!"

"We were too full of gross food. That stuff isn't even healthy. This stuff will help us grow better!"

Numbuh 3 pulled the string on the Monkey. "An Apple a day keeps the doctor away!"

Numbuh 4 growled. "Uh, Numbuh 4?" asked Numbuh 3. "Are you okay?"

Numbuh 4 pinned Numbuh 3 to the wall. "_Who are you and what have you done to the real Numbuh 3_?!"

"Uh…I _am_ the real Numbuh 3."

"Of course yer not, and I can prove it! What's Numbuh 3's favorite toy?"

"Haha, Rainbow Monkeys, silly!"

"AHA! I gotcha there, faker! The real Numbuh 3's favorite toys are Rainbow Monkeys!" Numbuh 4 laughed for a while…then his face changed as a startling realization came over him. "…wait, what?"

"Numbuh 4, you're starting to scare me. Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm not crazy! But maybe _yer_ crazy!"

Numbuh 3 gasped, tears filling her eyes.

"Wait! What I meant was-"

Numbuh 3 started crying and ran off to her room.

"Smooth move, Numbuh 4," Numbuh 1 said.

"Hey! You saw what she was doin'! Watchin' the news, stayin' in her room, eatin' health foods: somethin' is wrong with her!"

"Now, now. There's probably a logical explanation for this."

"Like what?"

"Mind control, of course! Some unseen force must be trying to control her, thus turning her against us. I'm going to go analyze Numbuh 3 before this force gets to the rest of us."

"What should I do?"

"I dunno." Numbuh 1 then walked off.

Numbuh 4 simply sat down. He then got back up. "Bored now. Imma go play a game!" He then ran off to the game room.

Numbuh 4 pushed the buttons on the controller. He made his giant robot fire upon other giant robots with full force power. However, as he played, a sudden thought came to mind.

"I HAFTA PEE!" he said, rushing outside the room. As he passed the hallway, he made his way to the stairs. He did not, however, notice the Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey on one of the higher stairs, so when he rushed down the stairs, he tripped on it and fell all the way down. "OWW!" he screamed, alerting Numbuh 3.

"What's wrong, Numbuh 4?" she said, forgetting all that had happened before.

When Numbuh 4 looked at Numbuh 3, it was a look of rage. "Whydja leave yer doll on the stairs?!"

"I don't remember doing that!"

"Whadya mean you didn't put it there? How else would it have gotten there?! But why'd ya hafta put it there?" Then a creeping realization came over him. "Unless… you were tryin' ta kill me!"

"What? Why would I want to do that?"

"That doll, that's why! That thing's fillin' yer head with bad thoughts, makin' you completely different! It's turnin' you into somethin' yer not! That's why we gotta get rid of that thing!"

Numbuh 4 charged towards the doll, but Numbuh 3 picked it up. "NO!" She screamed. "You helped me get this doll because you wanted to be a good friend! Now you want to get rid of it?! You're a…a…A MEAN-MEANIEPANTS!"

Numbuh 4 was shocked. How could she stoop that low?

"I'm going to bed, far away from YOU!" And thus Numbuh 3 stormed off to her room.

Numbuh 4 looked on. "That doll's gotta go…no matter the cost."

11:00PM. Numbuh 4 was in his room. However, he woke up suddenly, sensing something was wrong. Numbuh 3 was in her room, having gone to bed at an unusual time. Around 9:00. On Friday! Numbuh 4 saw an opportunity and smiled as he prepared to stop that doll.

Numbuh 4 entered the armory, where he picked up a…

Kids Next door: F.L.A.S.H. (Fully Lasatronic Attack Sword Hurts)

…a flashlight converted into a laser blade. He walked off to Numbuh 3's room, moving slowly. When he got to the door, he put his ear up to it to see if he could hear anything. He did: it was a voice that sounded like…the Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey?

When Numbuh 4 opened the door, his worst fears were confirmed: on the bed, the Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey was standing on its own, talking to a sleeping Numbuh 3. It constantly repeated a subliminal message: "Adults are perfect. Adults are flawless. Adults never make mistakes."

Numbuh 4 couldn't believe his eyes. That doll, standing on its own, was delivering untrue messages to his best-in-no-way-more-than-just-a friend. The sheer sight of it caused him to let out a scream.

This, however, alerted the Rainbow Monkey. "Hiiiii," It said. "My name is Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey, and I don't like you at all." Numbuh 4 shivered. "And you know what? Neither does Kuki. Wouldn't it make her so happy if she just suddenly disappeared? I think she'd like that. I think she'd like that a lot. Heehee…heeheehee…HAHAHAHAHA!"

Numbuh 4 turned on his F.L.A.S.H. "Over my dead body," he said.

"That's the idea!" The Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey jumped onto Numbuh 4's face, causing him to drop his F.L.A.S.H. It then started to move lower and lower on his face, covering his mouth and nose. Numbuh 4 grabbed onto the Monkey and tried to pull it off, but it didn't work. It just had too good of a grip. He then remembered that the best way to stop this sort of thing is to go for the limbs, so he grabbed onto the Monkey's limbs one by one and pulled them off, causing it to fall to the floor. However, it grabbed hold of the F.L.A.S.H., and began to chase Numbuh 4 around the treehouse, him screaming all the way.

Numbuh 4 went through a hall, hoping to lose the Monkey, but it was waiting for him right at the end. He then tried to go down the stairs nearest to him, but it held onto an inactive light at the bottom and dropped down.

Eventually, he found himself in the computer room, which was pretty much a dead end. Numbuh 4 backed up onto the computer as the doll moved closer and closer. However, he soon realized that he was near a fire alarm repurposed into an intruder alarm, so he pulled down the lever. This caused the emergency lights to flare up and sent Numbuh 1 and Numbuh 3 to the room, weapons in hands.

Numbuh 3 was shocked at what she saw: her Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey was pinning Numbuh 4 to a wall. "Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey!" she screamed. "You're alive?"

"Oh, darn. I was hoping you wouldn't notice," it said.

"What…what are you trying to do to Wally?"

"I thought you didn't like him. I'm just doing you a favor."

"But I really like Wally! He's my teammate! And my friend! And my-"

"But what about all the mean things he said to you? All the times he's tried to make you into a worse person? He's a bad influence, and we can't have that…can we?"

All of a sudden, the Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey was completely shot down by a barrage of laser fire, and as a result powered down. The boys realized the blasts came from Numbuh 3's weapon. "Do NOT hurt my friends. Especially not Wally."

"Wow," Numbuh 1 said, "you're girlfriend's really scary."

Numbuh 4 took offense. "She is NOT…my…girlfriend! She's a girl and she's my friend, but she's not my GIRLFRIEND!"

"I'm certain." Something caught Numbuh 1's eye. He picked up what was left of the doll and saw something on its foot. "I think I may know who had a hand in this."

The next day, at Toys Be We, the salesman who sold the Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey was continuing to sell the same doll in droves. Numbuh 1, Numbuh 3, and Numbuh 4 were nearby.

"I say we punch that jerk's lights out," Numbuh 4 said.

"In front of everyone?" Numbuh 3 said.

"Since when have we been good with the system? The system of _adults_?"

"Don't worry," Numbuh 1 said, "I have a plan." He then walked up to the salesman. "Ah, good day, Mister Adult Sales Person, sir! My friend bought one of your Cherry Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey thingies the other day, and she's been a whole new person; maybe even better!"

The salesman was stumped. "She is? I mean…of course she is! That's the power of the Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey!"

"Yes, indeed! I'd like to thank you for really helping out her family. Put 'er there!" Numbuh 1 held out his hand. The salesperson quickly shook it. "I'll be sure to tell everyone about you!"

When he got back to the rest of his team, Numbuh 4 asked him "Now what?"

"Now," Numbuh 1 said, "we wait…and follow." On the salesperson's hand was now a tracer that Numbuh 1 had planted. Things would fall into place.

At a secret base, the salesperson laughed maniacally. "I knew making that doll was the best decision of my life! Money down the handle, children becoming less annoying, and now everyone's gonna know about it, so I'm gonna earn more money! And the only thing it cost me was my beautiful moustache, but that's a small price to pay!"

"Maybe you should've thought about prices before you went into the bootlegging industry, CHESTER!" It was Numbuh 1, with Numbuh 3 and Numbuh 4 with him, weapons in hand.

"The Kids Next Door?! Is there anything you won't ruin?!"

Numbuh 1 gestured at him and said, "You had to be a bigshot, didn't you? You knew that since no one would pay attention to the designs of a criminal, you simply manufactured that Rainbow Monkey yourself. You couldn't find any store that would accept your design since it was unlicensed, so you sold it the old fashion way: like a used car salesman. An ugly, stupid, used car salesman. Of course, when the Rainbow Monkey Corporation comes in, they're gonna sue you into oblivion, and thus you'd lose all your money _and_ get thrown back in the slammer." Chester growled. "I wonder what would happen if a _concerned customer_ gave them a heads-up."

"That's not gonna happen, Brats Next Door! Rainbow Monkey Army…ATTACK!" A full troop of unlicensed Rainbow Monkeys charged at the operatives, but since they were so cheaply made a single laser blast was all it took to dismantle them. Numbuh 1 neared a console and found a phone. "No!," cowered Chester, "D-don't do that! I'll lose everything!"

Numbuh 1 picked up the handset, dialed a number, and put his head to the handle. "Hello, Rainbow Monkey Corporation? Do you know there's an unlicensed vendor of Rainbow Monkeys? Oh, yeah. And they added electronics, too. I trust you can do something about it. Bye!"

"NO!" Chester screamed. "If I can't win, you can't either!" He then pushed a button on the console, thus causing all the Rainbow Monkey dolls to self-destruct. "THERE! HAHAHA! Now they can't sue me! You don't have any evidence!"

"Oh, then we'll just put you in the Arctic Prison," Numbuh 1 said.

"That's right! …wait, what?"

The team found themselves back at Toys Be We. "Sure was nice of them ta give us back our money for the Rainbow Monkey," Numbuh 4 said. "Now I know not to pick up that Ultimate Prime Superion figure. Too many sounds could brainwash me!"

"Actually, Numbuh 4, that thing is an official license, so the worst they're gonna do is brainwash you to buy more toys, which you already do anyway," Numbuh 1 said.

"Wait, so you mean that I can buy that thing without a problem? Awesome!" And thus Numbuh 4 charged off to the isle. However, when he looked at where it was before, the figure was long gone. "What?! Where'd it go?"

A teenager in a Destructicon shirt spoke up. "He sold out, dude. He's a very popular figure. You can get him on eBid, though."

"Really? How much is it?"

"'bout a hundred bucks."

"O-O-ONE HUNDRED?! I can't pay that!"

"Maybe you should try the Pony Puff figures instead. That show's really good."

"…aww, never mind!"

End Transmission

* * *

**This was my first story where I hired an in-house editor. Considering the story was well-received on the KND Fan Forum, it seems to have worked out.**

** ""Okay, you've had yer fun. Let's go check out the Mech Changers line!"" Mech Changers is based off two things. Firstly, it's obviously based off Transformers. The second thing it's based off is one of Cartoon Network's existing parodies of Transformers, Mech Animals. Mech Animals appeared for a few seconds as a show the Powerpuff Girls were watching. At this point in time, the series is set in early 2006 (given the series timeline), so they're likely watching a parody of something in the Unicron Trilogy.**

**""My name is Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey, and I love you very much," the strange doll said." The Cheery Chatterbox Rainbow Monkey is based off Talky Tina from The Twilight Zone.**

**""Mech Changers will return in a moment, only Toonami," spoke a cool robotic voice." Again, since this is set in 2006, the show plays on Toonami, specifically the late TOM 3 era. This was made one year before Toonami returned for real. I still can't believe that happened!**

**"She immediately hit the channel onto a news station with a dull reporter and text that stated Bores News 24/7." Bores News has a parody of the Fox News logo in its corner. It's not biased, it's just very boring. I toyed around with the reporter having Ben Stein's voice or Britt Hume's voice.**

**""Kids Next Door, your video gaming, TV watching, power wasting days are over! Now you face…BRIGHT IDEA!"" Bright Idea occasionally appeared as a background character. Here, I fleshed out his role a little and gave him an MO. He's a representation of the parent who takes away your TV and Video Game privileges.**

**"He made his giant robot fire upon other giant robots with full force power." Numbuh 4 is likely playing a Gundam Versus Series game, probably one of the only two that were released in the US.**

**""But I really like Wally! He's my teammate! And my friend! And my-"" I try to keep the 3/4 relationship as teasing as possible. This is the reason the forum really liked it.**

**"You knew that since no one would pay attention to the designs of a criminal, you simply manufactured that Rainbow Monkey yourself." Remember, Chester has been thrown into prison at least once. The Editor really liked my method of defeating him. I really liked using Chester. He's underused. Everyone's too busy focusing on Father and the Delightfuls and the Teen Ninjas. Show some love for the lesser used villains!**

**""Maybe you should try the Pony Puff figures instead. That show's really good."" Cross between the show Dee Dee watches on Dexter's Lab and MLP:FiM. I might do a story sometime with Rainbow Monkeys instead of ponies based off the phenomena.**


	2. Operation HILL

**Pre-Reading Notes: Might be somewhat scary**

**Hypothetical Voice Cast**

**Numbuh 108: Brad Swaille**

**The Spider: Takahata101**

**The Groundskeeper: Scott McNeil**

**The Mystic Elevator: Eric Vale**

* * *

Now Loading: Kids Next Door Mission  
Operation: HILL

House  
Infinitely  
Lives  
Longer

Writing Operatives: Lieutenant Darkton  
Original Mission Director: Mr. Warburton

As the C.O.O.L.B.U.S. flew off to the abandoned town, the passengers, Numbuh 2, Numbuh 5, and Numbuh 108, a boy with a green shirt, jeans and a black baseball cap, lounged about the ship.

Numbuh 5 was talking on the phone. "Yeah. Dat's where we're gonna be. Think ya can get dere soon?" Numbuh 5 paused. "Great! See ya soon, Numbuh 86. Bah-bye!" She hung up.

"What did they call this thing again?" Numbuh 2 asked.

"The House over the Hill," Numbuh 108 said. "I tend to visit the place sometimes. My relatives lived here and keep a lot of cool stuff."

"What could possibly be cool enough for a bunch of old guys to keep?"

"Mostly old comics and some of the prizes that came with them."

"So why are we going here?"

"There's this piece of junk I wanna sell on eBid. It looks cool, but it's totally lame. I want you guys to look around for it with me.

"Sounds easy. It'd better be worth it. Do you know how long we've been gone? I wonder if the other guys miss us. Numbuh 4 said he was going to Toys Be We. That would've been so much fun."

"Hey, uh, Numbuh 108," Numbuh 5 said, "can Numbuh 5 ask ya somethin'? It's really important."

"Oh, there's our stop," Numbuh 108 said. "Let's land this thing."

The C.O.O.L.B.U.S. landed in a featureless field overlooking the two-story House over the Hill. Numbuh 2 decided to bring a steak with him, in case the mission was as long as the flight. As the passengers left the ship, a strange fog rolled in and a far off siren could be heard.

Numbuh 2 started to panic. "Uh, oh. I've heard stories about this fog. They say it leads to a land of nightmares filled with monsters and that nobody who's ever gone through it has left without going mad! We should really go back now."

Numbuh 5 looked around, and found a pair of items nearby. "Or," she said, "it could jus' be a smoke machine n' a CD playa. Like what's happenin' right now."

Numbuh 2 breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, good. I'd hate for it to be _that_ kind of fog. That'd be bad."

"Numbuh 2, are you alright?"

"I'm fine! Nothing to worry about, no siree! Why would I get scared by a bunch of…_smoke and mirrors_?" Numbuh 2 giggled.

Numbuh 5 groaned. "This is gonna be a loooong mission. Numbuh 5 can tell."

The door was opened by Numbuh 108 as he, Numbuh 5, and Numbuh 2 entered the House over the Hill. It was a rather old house, rickety, dark, and wooden. "So," Numbuh 2 asked, "what're we looking for?"

"A medallion," Numbuh 108 said. "Gold. Star on it. Probably worth a kajillion dollars on eBid."

"So where do you think it is?"

"Beats me. That's why you're here: to help me."

"Okay, that's nice Numbuh 108," Numbuh 5 said, "but there's really somethin' Numbuh 5'd like ta know. Somethin' 'bout-"

"Hey, I got an idea!" Numbuh 108 interrupted. "Maybe we can find that thing quicker if we split up. I'll go this way." Numbuh 108 entered the front door.

"So," Numbuh 2 said, "I guess we'll go another door?"

"Uh-uh," Numbuh 5 said. "We're gonna follow 'im. Been meanin' ta ask somethin' 'bout 'im."

"Okay, but let's go together. I'll be there in case you get scared or something."

"Yeah, I'm sure. Less go!" And thus the two entered the front door in pursuit of Numbuh 108.

Behind the door was a kitchen of sorts. It had everything a kitchen you would expect, including a sink, cupboards and a table. However, the metal in the room was rather rusty, and the surfaces were covered with dust. Another door stood in front of them, leading off to the side. The room was fairly quiet, except for a constant noise…

Drip…Drip…Drip…

"Do you hear that?" Numbuh 2 asked.

Drip…Drip…Drip…

"'Course I hear that," Numbuh 5 replied.

Drip…Drip…Drip…

"What do you think it is? …what if it's a body, hidden behind the walls, dripping with blood?"

Drip…Drip…Drip…

Numbuh 5 sighed with disappointment. "Take a look ovah there. What do ya see?" Numbuh 5 pointed.

Numbuh 2 looked at Numbuh 5's hand. "A…sink?"

"So…if there's a drippin' noise comin' in a room with a _sink_… where do ya think the noise could come from?"

"The…sink?"

"Exactly! Now less get outta here befo' that thing drives both o' us nuts."

"Uh…okay." And the two moved towards the door in front of them.

The floorboards creaked as the two passed through the hallway. Then they opened the next door in front of them to find a game room. There were very few games left by now. Nothing other than an old checkers board and what looked like a wooden game console.

A phone somewhere in the room began to ring. Numbuh 2 instinctively walked over to it and picked it up. "Hello?" he spoke to the receiver.

"BAD LITTLE CHILDREN DESERVE TO BE PUNISHED!" a voice on the other end said. Numbuh 2 almost turned white. "WHO IS THIS?"

"Uh…this is Numbuh 2…" Numbuh 2 nervously said. "…as in Hoagie Gilligan…Jr."

"Oh! Wrong number. This is your homeroom teacher. Someone's been skipping class lately, but it wasn't you. My mistake. Bye!" the other end went silent and Numbuh 2 breathed a sigh of relief.

"Hey, Numbuh 2," Numbuh 5 said, "less split up. Dere's four doors around the room, maybe we can find Numbuh 108 in one of 'em."

"Uh…" Numbuh 2 said nervously, "won't that be dangerous? I don't want you to get scared or anything."

"Oh, please. Whas the worst thing dat can 'appen 'round 'ere? Less get a move on." Numbuh 5 entered the next door in front of her.

Numbuh 2 slowly and carefully entered the door to the left, nervously squeaking along the way.

Numbuh 5 came across a garden in the loosest possible sense of the word. The flowers were shriveled, the trees were leafless, and even the grass was brown. It appeared that someone had not been taking good care of the place, but then again, considering what the rest of the house was like, it made sense.

Numbuh 5 poked through the shriveled foliage looking for the medallion, but found nothing.

All of a sudden, a Scottish voice could be heard. "'ey! What're _yoo _doin' 'ere?!"

Numbuh 5 tried to trace the voice, and found a groundskeeper with red hair, wearing a plaid shirt and overalls holding a rake. "Well, uh," Numbuh 5 said, "Numbuh 5 was lookin' for a medallion thingy? Heard of it? She kinda needs it."

"Oh, goin' aboot the house takin' things that aren't yoors, eh lass? Well, dat simply won't do! Meybe I shood straighten up yoor attitude! YAAARGH!" The groundskeeper charged at Numbuh 5, but before he made any contact he disappeared into nothing.

Numbuh 5 looked around for him, but couldn't find any signs of him anywhere. "Huh. Dass odd. Least he's gone." But when she turned back to the door, the groundskeeper was right behind her again, lifting up his rake.

Anyone remaining outside the door would overhear the sound of horrible pain and suffering. Eventually, Numbuh 5 exited the room, badly bruised.

"Numbuh 5 'n her big mouth…"

Numbuh 2 slowly opened his door and entered the room in front of him where he found a musty organ, covered with cobwebs.

"Hello?" Numbuh 2 called out. "Is anybody there?" Numbuh 2 turned and started to look around. "Seen a medallion around here?" he asked, unconfidently. Numbuh 2 continued his search. "Gold? Star on it?"

He then took a closer look at the organ, and sat down at the nearby seat. He pressed a key and a loud note of music shrieked out. He pressed another key and a different note played. Numbuh 2 looked to the left, looked to the right, and smiled. He cracked his knuckles and then proceeded to play a song he had heard on the internet somewhere. He couldn't remember the exact video, though he was sure it involved a cat keyboardist.

However, as he played on, he failed to notice a spider the size of his head crawl out of one of the cobwebs. The creature lowered itself on a web right above Numbuh 2's shoulder, dropped down onto it, and crawled up to the top of Numbuh 2's head. Numbuh 2 instinctively looked up.

"Hi!" the spider said.

As Numbuh 5 re-entered the game room, she could hear Numbuh 2's frantic screaming. In short order, Numbuh 2 himself ran out of the Organ Room and jumped into Numbuh 5's arms.

"Numbuh 5! It was terrible! It was terrible!" Numbuh 2 cried. "I was in this room, and there was an organ, and then there were a bunch of cobwebs, _and then a ginormous spider came out_, _and then it landed on my shoulder_, _AND THEN IT CRAWLED UP TO MY HEAD-_"

However, Numbuh 5 simply couldn't bear the weight of Numbuh 2 anymore, and fell to the ground.

Numbuh 2 weakly smiled. "Aha. Sorry."

"Ya know what?" Numbuh 5 said as she stood herself up. "Skip da whole splittin' up thang. Less go togetha fo' the rest o' the trip."

"Y…yeah. That sounds good."

The two immediately walked off, opening the remaining door. They came across a four-way division between three rooms and a closet. The handle of the closet was rusty, and the floorboards felt exceptionally loose.

Suddenly, a scream could be heard from somewhere. It started off quietly, and then became increasingly louder. Numbuh 2 almost let out a scream of his own, but he was stopped by Numbuh 5 clamping her hand over his mouth. Shortly afterwards, a new sound could be heard, this time a low-pitched laughter. Fortunately, Numbuh 5 could trace where that one was coming from, and opened up the closet to reveal the terrible secret that lay inside.

It was a cassette player.

Numbuh 5 popped the tape out and read the label. "'Creepy Sound Effects Collection: Volume 3.' Huh. Dis is old."

"R…really?" Numbuh 2 said quietly.

"Yeah. Dey're already out wit' Volume 10 dese days. Well, nuttin' ta see here. On ta da next room."

"Um…which room?"

"Less try da one to da left."

"A…alright." And so they did.

They found themselves in a hall, the floor and the walls patterned with stone. Ancient paintings lined the walls depicting events from days long since passed. In other words, you couldn't get any more boring.

"Uh…why don't you go first, Numbuh 5?" Numbuh 2 said meekly.

"No way. You go," Numbuh 5 replied.

"But…but it's so scary!"

"Dere's nuttin' wrong wit' da place."

"But…but every time we've gone into a room, something bad has happened!"

"Look, Numbuh 2: Ah know that things've been a lil' creepy, but every time somethin's gone like dat, it's always been somtin' normal. Maybe you should just look around and see dat dere's nuttin' wrong."

"O…okay…" Numbuh 2 forced a determined look on his face. "Okay!" He stepped out into the hall, suppressing his fear, reaching to the other side for the next door. He was going to make this work. He would not allow a bunch of cheap tricks to overcome him.

And then the floor under him promptly collapsed.

Numbuh 5 looked on dumbfounded "H-how did…but dat's a…and stone doesn'…_oh_, _nevah mind_!" She immediately turned on her J.E.T.T.A.B.O.O.T.S. and flew down to where the hole lead to. "You doin' fine, Numbuh 2?"

"Ow…I've had worse," Numbuh 2 said. "This is kind of a close second, though."

Numbuh 2 got up on his feet, and then noticed something very odd. Numbuh 5 noticed the same thing: the room was decorated with all sorts of stars, including a large star embossed on the floor, and in the center of this star was an adult-sized skeleton.

And in its hand was… "The medallion!" Numbuh 2 called out.

"Aww, yeah! Numbuh 5'd say we're juss about done here! Now we find Numbuh 108 and…wait." Numbuh 5 looked closely at the skeleton's other hand. Inside it was a S.C.A.M.P.P., which is not a weapon adults are known to use. She then looked at a piece of paper laying near the body. "'Turn back the clock?' Sometin's not right."

Numbuh 2 snatched up the paper. "This looks useful. I'll keep it with me."

"Dere's sometin' Numbuh 108 isn't tellin' us, and it's probably a lot worse den what Ah wanted ta know."

"All the more reason to go and find him."

"Right. Less see what we can do." She opened the first door she came across, Numbuh 2 tagging along.

Inside the door was what looked like a pristine elevator. "Welcome, master," spoke a pleasant voice. "Where would you like to go? I can take you anywhere within the house."

"Take us ta Numbuh 108," Numbuh 5 said.

"Who?"

"Ya know…green shirt? Jeans? Baseball cap?"

"Oh, _him_! Is that what they're calling him now? How odd. Right then, off we go."

The elevator mysteriously moved through the house, tracking Numbuh 108's position and stopped behind the nearest doorway that would take Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 5 to him, manifesting near the top of the staircase. "Destination reached. Have a nice day."

"Numbuh 2? Numbuh 5?" Numbuh 108 snapped in annoyance. "I thought we agreed we should split up!"

"Yeah, you agreed," Numbuh 5 said. "Ah said no. Bah da way, Ah've been meanin' ta ask ya sometin'."

"Aww…can't it wait? I'm still lookin' for the medallion."

"No. It can't."

Numbuh 108 growled. "Drgh…fine. Humor me."

"Ah was brushin' up on ol' Kids Next Door history. Ah found someone interestin' in da footage of da Battle of Cleveland. Can ya guess who?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Dat battle 'appened _twenny years ago_. If you were in dat battle, bah now _you'd be an adult_."

"Hey! H…how do you know it was me? It could've been some other guy who looks like me. Like…uh…my dad! Yeah, twenty years is good enough for my dad, right?"

"Well, Ah hope dat ain't da story yer gonna tell da Decommissionin' Squad, 'cause dey're on dere way here. Hopefully you can come up with sometin' betta."

"Please…they're no good. I'm sure they already learned their lesson about wrongly capturing operatives from when Chad went nuts and tried to have you two decommissioned. Besides, who are they gonna trust: a kid like me…" Numbuh 108 smiled evilly. "…_or an adult like you_?"

The mysterious sirens and fog reappeared, now enveloping the two. Numbuh 2 had seen it all before, though. "Please, I'm not afraid of this thing. You're just an old grey mare who ain't what he used to be…" but when the fog left, the two had…changed. Grown ten years older. "…and I'm about to send you to retire…HUH?! Is that _my_ voice? And why is everything so low?"

"N-Numbuh 2? Is dat you? What 'appened to ya?" Numbuh 5 said, shortly afterwards putting her hands over her mouth in disbelief of the sound that came out.

"M-me? W…what about you?"

The two screamed simultaneously.

But Numbuh 108 wasn't fazed. In fact, he seemed to lose a year on his life. "I don't know what you're talking about. _I feel great_!"

"What's going on?" Numbuh 2 asked. "Are we…older?"

"Oh yeah, there's this teensy little detail I may have forgotten to mention when we started up: _this house is alive_."

Both of the two children-turned-to-adults gasped.

"It is, however, very old. Probably wouldn't last long if it weren't for the fact that it can absorb youth. It takes the youth from others around it and uses it to feed itself."

"Wait a minute…why ain't you any olda?" Numbuh 5 asked Numbuh 108.

"Ah, that's the beauty of it! I made a deal with this house a while back. I convinced the thing to spare me in return for bringing more people here. The house gets to regularly feed, and I get to stay young!"

"Yer…yer just like Chad!"

"Oh, no. I'm nothing like Chad. Chad never went far enough!"

"Wait a minute," Numbuh 2 realized, "…the medallion! You want to sell it because it can make us young again! That's the only thing that's keeping this from being hopeless, even more so because I just so happen to have it with me!" He held the medallion out from his hand.

However, with a "Yoink!" Numbuh 108 stole it and rushed off to the nearest door. The other two chased after him. However, as they went on, they were starting to age further, gaining another ten years. For every ten years both of them gained, Numbuh 108 lost a year of his own.

Numbuh 108 noticed the two were on his tail, and threw a spider at them. "Hugs!" the spider said, gripping onto Numbuh 5. Numbuh 5 tried to shake it off, but it was just no use. However, Numbuh 2 kept a S.P.I.C.E.R. on hand and shot at it, causing it to fall off. "Aww, you're no fun," complained the spider as it scuttled off.

The two continued to chase after Numbuh 108, eventually backing him into a corner. "Now what're ya gonna do, ya dirty traita?"

"Here, Poppy!" Numbuh 108 said. In a few moments, a monstrous poodle jumped out of the shadows and pounced on Numbuh 2. "HAHAHAHAHAAA!" laughed the boy-man, thinking he was saved. "Never get between a dog and her snack!" However, he was lifted up by his collar by Numbuh 5, who plucked the medallion from him. His face contorted in rage. "Hey! No fair!"

"Ah'm still technically a kid," Numbuh 5 said. "Ah don' necessarily hafta play bah adult rules." She then turned to Numbuh 2. "Numbuh 2! Give dat dog yer surprise!"

"Aww…" Numbuh 2 said, "but I wanted to use it for myself…"

"Dat's not an option! Do it!"

"Fine…" Numbuh 2 pulled out the steak he was saving from his pants. The dog was immediately distracted. Taking advantage of this, the two real agents bid a hasty retreat to the elevator. Numbuh 108 immediately gave chase.

However, as they entered, Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 5 continued aging, gaining another twenty years each, while Numbuh 108 lost two more. They rushed into the elevator as quickly as possible. "Welcome master," the elevator said. "Where would you-"

"GET US TO DA MEDALLION ROOM! _FAST_!"

"Not to object, but wouldn't that kind of speed hurt?"

"_JUSS DO IT_!"

"Your funeral." The elevator immediately took off, sending Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 5 flying into the air. When it landed, it knocked them to the ceiling, after which they proceeded to drop onto the floor.

The agents moved as fast as they could to the center of the star. Numbuh 2 pulled out the paper and began to read. "'Turn back the clock, undo this curse; return that which belonged to me. Give back the-"

But before he could finish, he was knocked over, reeling after a shot from Numbuh 108, who held an advanced-looking weapon. "Game's over, kids! You're getting older by the second! And I'm pretty sure we all know what happens when you get too old. Hahaha…HAHAHAHA…_HAHAHAHAHA_!"

Numbuh 5 moved as fast as she could (which wasn't much) to Numbuh 2 and grabbing the paper from him while drawing her own weapon. She then proceeded to shoot the strange gun out of Numbuh 108's hands. While 108 was recovering, Numbuh 5 read the paper. "'Turn back the clock, undo this curse; return that which belonged to me. Give back the years I lost to you; and unless you want me to tell, HURRY!"

A bright light surrounded the area around him. Numbuh 108 fell to his knees and screamed as he felt the years he had previously lost added back to him. Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 5 sighed in relief as they felt the years drain away from them. After the light faded, everyone returned to the same age they were when they first entered the house.

"Testing, testing 1-2-3," Numbuh 2 said, soon noticing his voice was back to normal. "We…we're kids again!"

"We're kids again!" Numbuh 5 exclaimed.

The two held hands and jumped around. "We're kids again! We're kids again! We're kids again! We're-"

"Fools!" Numbuh 108 said. "So you may not go out from old age, but that doesn't mean you won't go the old-fashion way!" Numbuh 108 recovered his weapon and took aim. "So it's two against one, and that's still pretty good for me! I've got twenty years of experience, after all."

Suddenly, Numbuh 108 was covered with little red laser lights. He looked around to find himself surrounded by the Decommissioning Squad. "Numbuh 108," Numbuh 86 commanded, "you are scheduled for immediate decommissioning!"

Numbuh 5 smiled. "Two 'gainst one ain't dat bad, but how 'bout twenny 'gainst one? Hey, Numbuh 86, don' forget to wipe away dat guy's memory of a place called da House ova' da Hill."

"Wait!" Numbuh 108 pleaded as they dragged him out, "You can't do this! It was…it was my father! He's old enough to look like me but not be me, right?! NOOO!"

The remaining operatives left the house and entered the C.O.O.L.B.U.S. as quickly as possible. Numbuh 2 hit the buttons and the ship began movement towards the Treehouse.

"Whew!" Numbuh 2 said. "That was something else."

"Hey, been meanin' ta ask," Numbuh 5 said, "why were ya so jumpy?"

"Oh, I was up late watching Something."

"What was it?"

"No, really, that was its name. 'Something.'"

"Hey, wait a minute, isn't dat a lil' intense?"

"I was told there'd be aliens and monsters, and it seemed like it was gonna be fun. I think I'm gonna have nightmares."

Numbuh 5 smiled. "Well don' worry. Just think about the candy yer gonna get soon. Oh, and neva' take a bet from a stranga'."

The two laughed it off. The rest of the day would be just fine.

End Transmission

* * *

**To understand this story, you need to first understand that it's a parody/adaptation of Betrayal at House on the Hill. It's a game where a party of four walk into a haunted house. One of the team members is a traitor. There are a lot of scenarios to occur.**

**""Yeah. Dat's where we're gonna be. Think ya can get dere soon?"" I think I overdid Abby's accent on this one. It'll be toned down in the future.**

**"...Numbuh 108, a boy with a green shirt, jeans and a black baseball cap..." Numbuh 108 is based off the young boy character from the game.**

**"As the passengers left the ship, a strange fog rolled in and a far off siren could be heard." Silent Hill.**

**"Drip…Drip…Drip…" One of the scenarios you can get in the game is a sound of dripping driving you mad.**

**""BAD LITTLE CHILDREN DESERVE TO BE PUNISHED!" a voice on the other end said." I forget the specifics, but this is a scenario you can get in the game.**

**"Numbuh 5 tried to trace the voice, and found a groundskeeper with red hair, wearing a plaid shirt and overalls holding a rake." The groundskeeper is a potential scenario in the game. I made him Scottish as a reference to Willy from The Simpsons, a recurring in-joke in my family. We did actually encounter him in the garden once. In this case, Numbuh 5 rolled low and got the bad result.**

**"He couldn't remember the exact video, though he was sure it involved a cat keyboardist." Or, in other words, a Keyboard Cat.**

**"However, as he played on, he failed to notice a spider the size of his head crawl out of one of the cobwebs." The spider is really that big in the game. He's based on the DBZ Abridged Nappa. Seriously, I heartily recommend that series and will probably reference it a lot.**

**""I was in this room, and there was an organ, and then there were a bunch of cobwebs, ****_and then a ginormous spider came out_****, ****_and then it landed on my shoulder_****, ****_AND THEN IT CRAWLED UP TO MY HEAD-_****"" Based on a scared Krillin moment in TFS Episode 21.**

**"Suddenly, a scream could be heard from somewhere." Another game event.**

**"And then the floor under him promptly collapsed." There is, in fact, a collapsing floor event in the game. Yes, it can happen in a room with a stone floor.**

**"Inside the door was what looked like a pristine elevator." The Mystic Elevator in the game can take you anywhere where there's a door that hasn't been opened.**

**"It takes the youth from others around it and uses it to feed itself."" One of the Haunts in the game is the possibility of the House on the Hill making a bargain with one of the members. In my case, it was with the young boy character. The main difference is that the house in the game stole life, not youth, but they acted the same way.**

**""Not to object, but wouldn't that kind of speed hurt?"" If you roll low on the Mystic Elevator, you hit the bottom and take damage.**

**""Oh, I was up late watching Something."" The Thing.**

**Both of these stories were published on dA on Halloween, which explains their horror-like themes. I will do another Halloween episode, but that one will likely be actually scary.**


	3. Next Episode Preview

Incoming Transmission

Numbuh 1 reporting for duty! So, Numbuh 74.319 has called us away on a special mission. But why'd he have to bring Numbuh 692 along with us? So, we're going in somebody's dreams, huh? Good thing I have a trick or two up my sleeve? What? Is that... Numbuh 12? Beginning mission, Operation: DREAMS!

End Transmission


End file.
